is your pelvic floor too tight? here’s how to know.
The subtle signs of tension — and how to release what you’re holding
We don’t talk enough about this side of pelvic floor dysfunction.
Most women think, “I probably need to do more kegels” for basically any symptom they’re feeling. But for so many of the women I’ve worked with over the past 20 years — especially those in high-stress seasons, postpartum, or in perimenopause — the issue isn’t weakness. It’s tension.
Here are some signs your pelvic floor may be too tight (also known as a “hypertonic pelvic floor”):
You have difficulty initiating or fully emptying when you pee
You experience constipation or painful bowel movements
You notice tailbone pain, especially when sitting
Sex feels uncomfortable, painful, or emotionally disconnecting
You feel tension or gripping in your lower abdomen, hips, or inner thighs
You leak when you sneeze or run — even though you’ve been “doing all the right exercises”
Tension in the pelvic floor often reflects tension we’re holding in the rest of our life.
Letting go is physical — and emotional.
One way to start? Lie down with a small squishy ball (or a rolled towel) beneath your sacrum. Allow your body to drop into the ball and the floor beneath you. Breathe. Imagine your pelvic floor widening gently with each exhale.
No pushing. No pulling. Just softening.
Even notice tension softening in your jaw, your hands, your chest and your toes.
As you lie there, continue to imagine softening of the pelvic floor and abdomen.
Listen to your body? As you sit with this release, try to soften into the emotional layers that surface. What is your body telling you? Where do you feel tension or discomfort? Where does your mind wander? There’s no right way to feel—these sensations are rising for a reason, even if you don’t yet know why. Just listen. Acknowledge what comes up. And if it feels supportive, return to it later through journaling or quiet reflection.
If this resonates with you, I go deeper into this kind of practice in my Digital Studio “Finding Pelvic Floor Length” free video.
You’re not broken. You can create space. You can support yourself in letting go.
xx,
Allison
